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The Legend of Knute Rotknee
"One for the Ol' Gripper"
In 1964, famed quarterback Knute Rotknee, being the oldest football player in the history of the football league, at seventy-seven, had a fatal heart attack after throwing a hail mary pass with 3 seconds left in the Super Corpse Bowl.
Knute, the only football player ever to be carried "into" a game, never found out if his wide receiver caught the ball. It turns out he never did. That's because Knute never threw it. Henceforth, Knute, who still clutches the game ball to this day, went down in football lore. Knute still tightly clutches that football (over forty years later) in his rigor mortis fingers, in his glass case at the Football Hall of Shame in Augusta Georgia.
Thanks to the generosity of the Football League and National Geolaffic, we have borrowed Knute, from his stand in his display case, and used his preserved corpse to recreate his famous last moments on that fateful day -- when Knute stepped back into the pocket and into his grave.
Knute Rotknee will forever be written into the history books as The 'Ol Gripper.
We thank our G&C Cheerleader Mourners: Charlotte Stokely (AVN starlet of the year Nominee), Melissa Reed (Adams apple bobbing champion), and Dee Kay (the NFLs oldest cheerleader) for their participation in this historic sports reenactment.
Knute... this corpse's for you.
RIP
The Grin Creeper
R.S. Rhine
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